Jesse Waters: I mean, Pence, seriously. We have this great thing going with Joe ...
Greg Gutfeld: Yeah, and he just ruined it!
Jeanine Pirro: He did!
Jesse Watters: Come on, man!
Greg Gutfeld: Now what are we gonna do?
The Corporate Media had it. They fucking had it. The "scandal" to take down the Biden White House. The narrative was building. The fever was growing. The coverage was cresting. Slimy Republicans war criminals like Ari Fleschier had slithered out from under their rocks to take shots at President Biden. Maria Bartiromo wanted to know, "Is this Treason?" And then... and then fucking Mike Pence wrecked everything. Just like he did on January 6th.
Classified documents were discovered in the Indiana home of former Vice President and current human slime mold Mike Pence.
Now, Mike Pence is no hero. After losing the 2020 election Pence was asking anyone and everyone for permission to declare the election fraudulent and cause a Constitutional Crisis. But, nobody was willing to give him the cliched affirmative head nod to Do It. And the Republican Ron Johnson was stopped at the last minute from handing fake electoral ballots from Wisconsin to Pence so reluctantly Mike Pence didn't overtly aid in the conservative Coup attempt to overthrow the United States Government.
But, even after the murderous mob and conservative kill teams descended upon the Capitol Building calling to "Hang Mike Pence" he has stuck to Trump like the spineless amoeba he is.
But, that was the past. Now, we had the circling Corporate Media ready to take down a Democratic President. To prove they're not Liberal! To prove their BothSides bonafides! To catapult the Republican propaganda as they always fucking do. To recreate the But Her Emails coverage with the growing unprecedented Classified Document Scandal!
But wait, you might say, Trump had hundreds of documents at Merde-A-Lardo. Trump denied having them. Trump fought efforts but Government officials to recover them. Trump concocted a story about declassifying them with his best brain, about the FBI planting them in Melanina's underwear drawer. These aren't the same thing! But, I would remind you that the Media doesn't cover Trump or Republican scandals the same way they do for Democratic officials. The Corporate Media expects Republicans to be despicable. The Corporate Media knows Republicans are going to commit scandals and are going to go on non-stop scandal sprees one after another. That's boring. And that's Old News.
But, Democrats! Oh ho! When the Media gets hold of a Democratic scandal. They gnaw that bone For Years. And the Corporate Media has been pissed at President Joe Biden ever since he took away their War Boner Coverage. The Media tried to make the End of the Afghanistan War a giant problem for President Biden. After not covering it for years. After not caring about anything in that region of the world for a decade after Osama Bin Laden's death. The Corporate Media had a chance to emulate Walter Cronkite's Vietnam war coverage or recreate the Wolf Blitzer's famous moments of the 1991 Iraq War. It was a chance to make their bones. They were going to dine out on the DC circuit for years on the Blame Joe Biden for the Afghanistan Debacle. (Incidentally, the Afghanistan "Debacle" is one of the things Major Traitor Greene and the Republican Clown Congress want to "investigate" President Biden).
But, despite some rightwing think tanks gleefully joining in on blaming Joe Biden for Afghanistan, the US people lost interest rather quick. Because, except for small window at the end of 2001, the US people have never given shit about Afghanistan. George W. Bush and his cadre of war criminals knew this; that's why they ginned up Iraq. W(orst President Ever) wasn't going to repeat the mistake of his father by expecting an easily won War to propel him to a second term. And the leadership of the Republican Party knew then what they know now; they can get away with any Republican lies, crimes, and scandals by ginning up false equivalent scandals in the rightwing media world which they expect the Corporate Media to uncritically adopt.
And man they had it! The Classified Documents of President Biden was going be the missing 30,000 emails of Hillary Clinton. But, oops spineless Mike Pence did it again! Faux News was livid last night! Rightwingers across Twitter were pissed off; why didn't Mike Pence just destroy these documents he had? Why did Mike Pence (or his lawyers) reveal they had them? Why oh why did Mike Pence destroy their precious Narrative?
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