Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Huge Boobs makes a Lawyer...

Lawyer objects to Buxom Woman
A Chicago lawyer says his opponent in a small claims case is using an unfair tactic by sitting a buxom woman next to him at counsel's table.

Attorney Thomas Gooch says the woman's sole purpose "is to draw the attention of the jury away from the relevant proceedings" — a dispute over a used car.

"Personally, I like large breasts," he said. "However, I object to somebody I don't think is a qualified paralegal sitting at the counsel table — when there's already two lawyers there — dressed in such a fashion as to call attention to herself."
I object! Basically, without pictures this story is worthless. How do you have a lead about a "Buxom Woman" and not even include a courtroom artist's sketch?

Well, seriously, the lawyer's arguments are basically that the jury will be so focused on the giant (.)(.) juggs that their erections will keep them from ruling in his favor. What does it say about the lawyer? Is this a good argument? Or does it fall under the tri-parte lawyers adage;
When the facts are on your side, argue the facts. When the law is on your side, argue the law. And when you don’t have either the law or the facts on your side, just argue!
However, we do have a rare case of a lawyer telling the truth when Gooch (really, Gooch?) states, "I like large breasts."


Infidel753 said...

I see only one "huge boob" in this story.

Furthermore, I'm not sure his objection belongs in "small" claims court.

Anonymous said...

The assholes are you people that write this bullshit. Blaming George Bush is always you excuse, how about the man in the white house right now taking some responsibility instead of filling his mought with chickin wings.

Do we need to make some changes to Social Security and Medicare? You bet your sweet ass he does.
Along with 50 other stupid socialist policies.

Grung_e_Gene said...

Infidel753 while you're comment was correct at the time, it was trumped when a Right Wing Boob showed up to spew crap about "chickin wings" and socialism.

Infidel753 said...

True. He should wash out his "mought" with sope.